Chapter 1
It is 4 A.M. in a large Cul-de-sac that goes by the name of "Halo Wars ave." here a group of unlikly friends live here that must deal with the insane momenst of life from Monday to Friday, but I'm not going to narrate this story lets just witness how insane their lives truly are!
Arbiter1000 was passed out drunk on his recliner in the Living room with the T.V. still on playing re-rolls of the "Care Bears finally go to hell" Movie series. Suddenly a loud bang at his front door brought the Drunken Elite out of his deep slumber causing a stream of curses to fly from his mouth.
"WHO THE F*** THINKS ITS ALRIGHT TO COME TO MY MOTHERF***ING HOUSE AT FOUR IN THE F***ING MORNING! S*** F***ING A**WIPES!" A clearly still drunk Arbiter1000 shouted as he stumbled to the door. When he answered it he found the massive, mentally challenged Hunter, known as Ricky to all residents, stand at his door.
"What are you doing here Ricky?" A calmer but still irratated Arbiter said as he looked up to the Hunters "face".
"OB KICKED ME OUT CAUSE I USED HIS NEW HARDRIVE AS A TOILET TO MAKE A POOPIE!" The mentally challenged Hunter cried pulling Arbiter into a back-breaking hug.
"Ricky...............let go.................I'm dying............from lack of...........air!" Arbiter wheezed out as he spoke to the Emotional Hunter.
"Okie dokie Arbiter!" The Hunter cheered letting go of Arbiter.
"Thanks, now would you like to tell me why you came here?" A now somehow sobber Arbiter asked Ricky.
"Cause no one else will let me stay with them." Ricky said as he sniffled.
"Arty?" Arbiter asked
"Tried to blow me up with a rocket launcher." Ricky replied.
"NT?"
"Flamed at me until I left crying."
"Killer Grunt?"
"To busy trying to douse the flames on his balls."
"Vigil?"
"Shot shinging light at me and tried to hit me with his big red stick."
"Awsome?"
"Just said >:( and closed the door."
Arbiter sighed and looked up at the big Hunter. "OK, you can stay." Arbiter finally replied in defeat.
Ricky cheered and turned around. "Come on Miss Peanuts! Mr. Arbiter1000 is being nice and letting us stay with him!" Ricky shouted. Once he shouted this a giant African Elephant came lumbering out of nowhere.
"WHAT HELL IS THIS RICKY?!" Arbiter shouted in a mix of shock, horror, and rage.
"Shes Miss Peanuts! I met her yesterday and shes my bestest best friend!" Ricky shouted as he suddenly appeared on the elephants back.
"GOD DAMMIT RICKY!" Arbiter shouted as the elephant trumpted waking up the neighborhood which followed by a loud string of curses from each house.
Chapter 2 The trip to Hawaii and meeting Characters from the other gaming universes
A few days had passed since the incident with Ricky and Ms. Peanuts, and currently most of the residence were checking their mail.
Suddenly everyone heard a shout coming from Boot to the Head's house. "SWEET JESUS MARY I WON!! I F***EN WON!!" Everyone could hear Boot sceraming.
"What exactly did you win?" One of the new Residence a energy sword named UnorthodoxT REX asked as he hopped up to Boot.
" I won us all a free trip to Hawaii!" Boot shouted in joy.
Everyone shouted in joy and Awsome just said "XD"
The next day everyone was packed and they began their journey to the airport.
"We're gonna be late to the flight Arbiter!" Vigil shouted hitting Arbiter with the hilt of his lightsaber.
"OW! Dammit Vigil I respect you and all but if you keep that s*** up your gonna end up in a box 6 feet under sleeping with the Worms." Arbiter replied angrily, recieving another smack from Vigil's Lightsaber hilt causing him to shout in pain again.
"XD" Awsome laughed at Arbiter's shouts of pain.
"Shut up Awsome or I'll light your nuts on fire like I do to Killer all the time!" Arbiter shouted.
":'(" Awsome cried.
They finally arrived at the Airport half-an-hour later.
"Che, about time we got here!" Dholla said annoyed.
"Hey! Its not my fault that deer ran out into the road and I had to swerve into the wrong exit lane!" Arbiter shouted.
By now alot of people were staring at the group of new Arrivals til someone from the crowd shouted.
"Arbiter! Itsa you!" A plumber in blue overalls and with a red cap with an "M" on it shouted.
"Mario! Long time since we were in the tournament with you and the others!" Arbiter shouted walking up to the Plumber crouching down to shake the Plumber's hand.
"Ia know! Wea all've been waiting toa see if youa guys woulda join up again. Buta more importantly, whya area you all here?" Mario asked as he shook hands with Arbiter.
"Boot won us a free vacation to Hawaii." Arbiter answered the Plumber.
"Whya what a coincidence! Mosta of the Characters from abuncha Xbox 360, PS3, and Wii games area going for the annual hawaiian game characters party." Mario said.
As the others looked around they could see different Characters from the many games made visiting the Airport to go to hawaii.
Suddenly Arbiter turned around and shouted as he chased one of the few people that wasn't a video game character there.. "You little *** get back here with my wallet!"
Arbiter quickly darted after the man into the gate zone where many characters watched in surprise as the massive Elite chased after the fleeing human.
"Try to catch me Motherf***er!" The man shouted but was suddenly stopped and frozen, Arbiter stopped running and looked at the man in surprise.
"I believe that man has something that belongs to you." A man with a deep raspy voice and was wearing a Orange and black sweater and grey pants said walking up to Arbiter.
"Thanks but could you happen to unfreeze him?" The man nodded and the man unfroze to find himself in Arbiter's clutches held by his collar.
"Where the hell is my wallet?!" Arbiter shouted.
The man began to yell in hisses and grunts.
"Would you happen to know what the hell he just said?" Arbiter asked the man who had frozen the pick pocket.
"I have no idea, I think he was speaking an Alien lanuage." The man said in surprise.
Arbiter back handed the pick pocketer. "Your Human for gods sakes speak some god *** english your embarassing your race!" Arbiter shouted.
Finally after 5 straight minutes of Arbiter shouting at the pick pocketer he gave Arbiter his wallet back.
"Thank you very much, but also you, I didn't catch your name, but my name is Arbiter1000" Arbiter said holding his hand out.
The Man took it and told Arbiter his name. "Paxton, Paxton Fettel or Paxton Wade depending on who you talk to."
Arbiter's eyes grew wide and stepped back alittle. "Your.....Your Paxton Fettel? Son of Alma Wade?" Arbiter asked in shock.
Paxton's smile disappeared and turned his head alittle and sighed. "Yes, yes I'm the son of Alma Wade. You have a problem with that?" Paxton said turning his head and looking at Arbiter alittle irratated.
"No I have no problem with it, I just wish you and your mom would find another way of taking revenge on the company that used her, but what am I saying I don't know what it was like." Arbiter said getting back to normal and making Paxton relax again.
"Arbiter I finally found you! What were you thinking when y-oh my god its the spawn from hell in the game F.E.A.R.!" Killer cried in terror.
"Shut up Killer! Time for your manhood to burn!" Arbiter shouted as he pulled a lighter and spray can out of no where and set Killer's manhood on fire with it.
"WHHHYYY ME!" Killer cried, but his manhood suddenly stopped buring from the fire as the fire disappeared.
"He was scared, I see no reason in doing that to him, even though it was entertaining to watch." Paxton said the last part smirking.
"AWWWW! Its more fun to watch them burn though!" Arbiter whined.
Suddenly over the intercom a voice called out " Gate 24 is leaving in 5 minutes."
"Hey Killer thats our flight, lets get going." Arbiter said as he picked the Grunt up and gave him a piggyback ride.
"I'll come with you, me and my family have the same flight." Paxton said walking next to Arbiter.
"Oh god, please let this flight go good and not have the great demon woman kil us all on the flight." Arbiter said in a preacher pose.
Paxton chuckled. "You should be more worried about her suffering a mood-swing in mid-flight."
Suddenly Arbiter stopped "Oh.......god........I forgot she got pregnant in the last game.......we're f***en doomed!" Arbiter cried as they continued walking.
Chapter 2 part 2
All of the residence from Halo Wars ave. boarded the plane with the rest of the passengers.
Arbiter conyinued to walk to his seat until who he was sitting with.
"No.....no no........no no no no no no no no no!" Arbiter whispered as he realized he was sitting next to the last person he would ever want to meet, Alma.
He asked all of the other if they would be willing to change seats but all declined thinking that Arbiter was trying to get their window seats.
"Just relax, stay calm around my mother and you oughta be fine." A man said, it was Pointman, Alma's other son.
"Your kidding right?! I have to sit next to the empress of hell itself!" Arbiter whispered to Pointman.
"Just relax, and if she tries to speak to you answer as calmly as pssoible and once you answer her questions she'll probably ignore you for the rest of the flight." Pointman whispered backed.
Arbiter swallowed his fears and walked up and sat next to her, from what Arbiter could tell it looked like she would have the kid pretty soon.
'Ah christ! Is that kid gonna try to tellepathicly talk to me on this flight? I pray its brain is not that developed.' Arbiter thought to himself.
'Actual, I can.' Arbiter suddenly heard a child-like voice ring in his head.
'Oh god! Please tell me I'm going insane!' Arbiter "spoke" back in fear.
'Actually your not, can I ask why you fear us?' The child's voice rang in his head again.
' Its a stupid reason, you probably would have heard better reasons.' Arbiter answered back ashamed.
' I won't mind, tell me pleeeeeease?' The child begged.
' Alright, when I went and got a copy of the fear 2 game when I played it spirits that had somehow possessed the game came out and attacked me for two weeks until I got rid of the game, and 2 took on the shape of Alma, your mom, and Paxton, your brother, and they were my worst attackers.' Arbiter finally answered.
' Oh, I'm sorry that happened to you.' The child said back to him
'Thanks, you know I might be able to tolerate sitting next to you mom if we keep talking, you seem respectful and kind enough.' Arbiter said back with respect.
While this was happening the plane had taken off and people were aloud to take their seatbelts off.
"Hey Boot help me to the bathroom!" Vigil said to Boot.
"Why? You got a cane take yourself!" Boot replied back.
"Just help me." Vigil replied
"Fine fine I'll help! God!" Boot said finally relenting.
Boot took Vigil to the bathroom and helped him in but doing his cause him to hit his knee causing him to fall over, unfortunatly Vigil sat right on top of it.
"Vigil your sitting on my hand!" Boot shouted trying to pull his hand out but he couldn't.
Vigil had already blocked out all sounds coming to him as he prepared to take a dark sider. "Ah padded seats! God I love them it makes it so much easier to drop a dark sider!" Vigil said more to himslef then Boot.
"No, nooooooo, HEY GUYS HELP ME!" Boot shouted to his friends.
Everyone turned around to look at the door to see what the commotion was, soon Arbiter heard it and bolted to the bathroom.
He kicked the door open to see Vigil with his pants down sitting on top of Boot's hand.
"AH MY EYES! OH GOD ITS LIKE WALKING IN ON KILLER GRUNT WHEN HES NAKED IN HIS ROOM! Wait a minute Killers always naked...........OH GOD KILLER WALKS AROUND NAKED!" Arbiter shouted as he clasped his hands over his eyes.
"ARBITER SHUT UP AND HELP ME!" Boot shouted at him, now eveyone had turned around to see what was happening.
"Seriously what the hell are you guys doing?!" Arbiter asked in complete shock.
"I had to help him to the bathroom and he decided to sit on my hand when I had to grab it to keep me from falling over!" Boot cried.
"Ahhhhhh the force is strong with this one it will be hard to release!" Vigil shouted as he tried to relieve himself.
"Oh god no! Arbiter help me!" Boot shouted as he tried to pul his hand out.
"Dholla come help us! On the count of three we pull! ONE! TWO! THREE!" Arbiter shouted as Dholla came up and helped, the 3 pulled Boot free stumbling out of the bathroom when Boot jumped up and started screaming as he inspected his hand.
"OH MY GOD! YOU ALMOST CRAPPED ON MY HAND! I OUGHTA KILL YOU VIGIL!" Boot shouted at the bathroom. all that could be heard was Vigil's manical cackle as the door shut.
After they calmed down Boot, Dholla and Arbiter went to sit back down.
'HAHAHAHA! MAN THAT WAS PRICLESS!' Alma's child said between laughs.
Arbiter chuckled 'Thats NOTHING compared to what we deal with every day back home.' Arbiter replied back.
"Why don't you tell us both then?" Alma suddenly said in a low feminine voice.
".........You knew I was talking to the kid didn't you? I bet you were listening in on our earlier conversation to, thats pretty sneaky." Arbiter smirked saying the last part.
A small smile appeared on Alma's lips. " I admit I did listen in, plus don't think we are like the way we are in the game, its just our job in the game." Alma replied.
"I kinda knew that, but hey, I have to admit you are one insane b**** in that game." Arbiter said smiling.
"Yes, yes I am, and I still can be one if someone pisses me off enough." Alma replied smirking.
As Arbiter spoke to Alma Boot was looking through his bag.
"Boot what are you doing?" Killer asked seeing Boot do this.
"Getting alittle surprise for Vigil when he comes out." Boot said smiling evily as he pulled out a frag grenade.
Unfortunatly Amy the hedgehog was sitting behind Boot and saw him pull out the grenade, the next thing everyone heard was Amy screaming "TERRORIST!"
All the heroes and villians turned around immediatly and looked in Boot's direction and the grenade.
"Jump him!" Wario shouted as some of the the heroes and villians jumped on Boot causing him to accidently pull the pin and drop the grenade, luckly Kirby thought it was food and sucked it up causing it to explode harmlessly.
"Oh thank god!" OB said since he had seen the grenade fall down.
"Hey, at least it can't get any worse right?" UnboundT REX said.
"No! No! Don't say that!" Arbiter said turining in his chair and looking at Rex behnd him.
Suddenly an explosion could be heard from the bathroom.
"Ahhhhh the force was indeed very strong with this one! Now whos going to help me off the toilet?" Vigil shouted from the bathroom.
"I told you not to say that and look what happened!" Arbiter shouted at Rex.
Once the plane landed in Hawaii things had relativly settled down.
As everyone was getting off the plane Boot was talking to Pointman about guns, Dholla had found an equal in power in Bowser and they were talking, Killer Grunt was asking about how Paxton used his psychic powers, Vigil was scheming with Ganondorf on how to take over the world, and Arbiter and Alma were having a political debate on what would happen to Cuba when Fidel Castro's brother left office and if it would remain a communist Country.
"I'm telling you once both of those two are six feet under that government will tumble and turn into a democracy!" Arbiter debated with Alma.
"I wouldn't be to sure about that, their nation has been acustomed to being communist for so long they'll still be communist even when both of those two finally die!" Alma argued back.
"Hey Arbiter! We need to figure out where we're staying come on!" Offensive Bias yelled to him.
"We might as well join you snce thats where everyone else is going" Paxton said as he, Pointman and Alma followed the group.
Once they reached the receptionist who would tell them where they would stay they were told that they would be staying in the hotel with the SSBB cast, the Wade family was told the same, a bus was waiting to take both groups to the hotel.
"Looks like we'll be seeing each other again." Alma answered looking at the residents of HW ave.
"Yeah we might, if we aren't busy with other friends of ours." Arbiter answered.
Suddenly Alma hugged Arbiter. "Thats for being the first person to be nice to me in awhile, and this-" Alma said as she slammed her fist into Arbiter's head causing his eyes to bug out from the pain. "Is for think the Cubans will become democrats when the Castro bros. die."
"Ha! Arbiter got a smack down from a chick!" NT laughed as Arbiter fell to the ground unconcious due to pain.
Chapter 3
Everyone was now at the hotel and had found thier rooms, currently Arbiter was still KO'ed from the punch by Alma during the Cuba debate, everyone else was busy deciding on what to do.
"Hey Maggot! Do you have any ideas?" Arty called over to the newest member of the group who had moved in the day before leaving the avenue.
"Me? Uhhhhh how about the beack?" Maggot stammered in surprise at being asked.
"The beach? YEAH I WANNA GO TO THE BEACH!" Ricky cried in joy.
"OK, beach it is then." Dholla said.
After everyone had gotten bathing-suits on they all went down to the beach including Arbiter who was still out cold but was carried my Maggot and Dholla.
"Good God! Why is he so heavy?" Maggot asked straining to keep Arbiter up.
"Thats what Arbiter's cooking does to you, you may not look it but you gain a crapload of weight yet still remain fit." Dholla answered.
Maggot didn't bother asking since it didn't seem possible to gain weight and not visibly notice it, withing 5 minutes they had made it to the beach.
"YEAH! I'M GONNA MAKE A SAND CASTLE!" Ricky shouted as he ran to the sand.
"What the....hey Mario was telling the truth bout ch'you guys bein here!" A blue falcon exclaimed in a boston accent.
"Falco my main man whats up?" Boot said walking up to the falcon and bumping fist.
"Nuttin much, ey you wanna join our volleyball game?" Falco said pointing to a nearby court where charcters from SSBB were playing.
"Sure why not." Boot said walking with Falco.
Soon most of the others followed suit and joined the game. Awsome, Rex, Arbiter (who was STILL unconscious!), Maggot, Vigil, and Grunt decided to sunbathe.
"Hey heres a good spot! Come on daddy!" A little girl with blue hair shouted to a man who looked quite short for his age.
"Hold your horses child! I can't move that fast when I'm trying to balance all this crap!" The man shouted as a woman that looked very similar walked up next to him.
"Vegeta stop cursing dammit!" The woman shouted.
"I could say the same thing woman!" The man now known as Vegeta retorted.
Immediatly Arbiter woke up and looked in the direction he heard the name followed by his 5 friend's heads.
"Holy crap its Vegeta from DBZ!" All six shouted.
"You had to say my name woman! Now the whole beach probably knows we're here!" Vegeta shouted.
"Well I wouldn't of shouted if you hadn't shouted!" The woman retorted.
"Mommy! Daddy! Stop fighting! I want to have fun not listen to you two fight!" The little girl shouted.
"Alright. We'll stop fighting." Vegeta said relenting.
Soon the group of 3 sat down right next to the six friends, for five minutes the group looked at the family with jaws wide open.
"Do you have something to say or are you just gonna keep staring?!" Vegeta said irratatedly to the group.
"Vegeta be nice! Sorry my names Bulma." Bulma said holding her hand out for someone to shake.
"Uh hi I'm Maggot and these are my friends." Maggot said shaking Bulma's hand.
Everyone said their names and said hello and the group decided to stick together and talk.
"Here mr. Maggot i made a ring for you!" The 8 year old named Bulla said giving Maggot a shell ring.
"Why thank you, its a nice gift." Maggot said thanking the girl.
"Yeah! Daddy look! I gave Maggot a ring so now we can get married!" Bulla exclaimed with joy.
The glass in Vegeta's hand shattered into a million pieces and Maggot's eyes bugged out in horror.
"Say. That. Again." Vegeta said between breathes as he tried to calm down.
"Don't you remember? I made a bet that if I could get someone to marry me you would take me to the mall here!" Bulla exclaimed.
Immediatly both men relaxed, she wasn't being serious.
"Hey Bulla, you almost got our friend obliterated by your dad." Rex said hopping up to her.
"Really?" Bulla said in surprise.
"......Are you sure your not a blonde?" Killer asked, suddenly a yellow ball wizzed by and hit Killer's manhood.
As Killer ran around screaming Vegeta looked to the others. "Anyone else want to say my daughter is stupid?" He didn't get a response since everyone else was laughing at Killer as he ran around with his flaming manhood.
For a few more hours they two groups talked until both decided to leave.
"Hey! maybe you can join us another day when we're with Goku!" Bulma said getting up.
"That would be interesting to see." Arbiter said already imagining Ricky and Goku quickly getting along.
"Oh by the way, why are you guys here?" Vigil asked.
"Maybe its fact that we have over 20 games about us." Vegeta repied sarcasticly.
Eveyone laughed and went seperate ways.
Chapter 4 Writer:Smile4youtube
Now back at the hotel room, the group was trying to decide what to do next.
"Maybe we could go to a movie," said Vigil.
"We could but do you remember the last time Ricky went to a movie," said UnboundT Rex
"Oh yeah. That was horrible," said Vigil.
"What happened?" asked Maggot.
"Let's just say that there was a major blackout, a stampede of buffalo, and a dead cat," said Arbiter1000.
"I'm afraid to ask," said Maggot. "Speaking of Ricky where is he?"
"I don't know," said UnboundT Rex, "but I wouldn't worry to much"
"I know. What about a strip club," said Vigil.
"Ok," said everyone at once.
So off they went to the strip club. As soon as they walked in, everyone's jaw dropped.
"Please tell me I am not seeing what I am seeing," said Maggot.
" I think you are," said Vigil, "as long as it is Ricky stripping."
"Yeah that is what I saw to," said Maggot.
Out of no where Killer ran in."Hey guys, Mario is.....," said a paniced Killer.
"Mario said what," exclaimed Boot and Awsome said "O-O" at the same time.
All of a sudden Killer's manhood got really big.
" KILLER THAT IS GROSS," yelled Arbiter1000. " KILLER WHAT DID MARIO WANT."
"Oh yeah, he said he needed to see you guys now," said Killer.
"Ok, let's go," said Arbiter1000 and Vigil.
Chapter 5
The group ran outside to see over a dozen cars crashed into each other.
"Mama Mia! Therea you guys are!" Mario shouted running up to them.
"What the hell happened here Mario?" Vigil asked.
"A girlsa day out happened!" Mario shouted pointing to the group of female characters.
"Of course women, they down right suck at driving." Ricky sneered. (For any women members reading this we writters do not support sexism, we do find it funny if a retarded Hunter says it though. But we apologize before hand if you are offended.)
"Ricky! Don't you dare be sexist!" OB shouted.
"Whats Sexist?" Ricky asked turning back to normal old retarded Ricky.
"Shut up Ricky! How can we help Mario?" Arbiter asked.
"You coulda go ask the girls howa this happened." Mario answered.
So Arbiter, Killer, Vigil, Maggot, and Dholla went over to the girls.
"Before you start asking questions we have one, why do we want to beat the hell out of the giant over there?" Samus said pointing to Ricky across the street.
"Your talking about someone who can't tell whos a guy or girl unless he sees if the person has a "Wee-wee Stick" or doesn't have a "Wee-Wee stick"." Arbiter answered Samus as he looked at Ricky over his shoulder.
"Good point." Samus said.
"Now can we know why the crash happened?" Vigi asked.
"Alma had a mood swing because the ice cream parlor didn't sell peanut butter, tofu, pickled ice cream." Lara Craft said not hiding the disgust on her face at the flavor ice cream the girl wanted.
".......Would you say that again please" Dholla asked wide-eyed.
"She had a mood swing over the parlor not having the ice cream she wanted." Princess Peach repeated.
"Ha! Man thats awesome! I wish I coulda seen everyones faces when that happened!" Arbiter said laughing.
"You find that funny?" Zelda asked flabbergasted.
"Of course! Its like when Ricky let the Thornbeast out of Thunder's Caral and we had to run our asses off to get to the lake for safety!" Vigil answered laughing now as well.
"Oh yeah I remember that! God that was epic!" Killer said laughing now as well.
Alma then appeared in front of the group. "You guys aren't mad?" Alma asked in a surprisingly childish voice.
"Of course not! that was the funniest thing I heard all day, I bet you would fit right in with us! But to be serious here we're not mad at you cause this is what happens with having a kid, you get mood swings." Arbiter said seriously as he stopped laughing and pointed at her distended stomach.
"Well......thanks I guess!" Alma said smiling.
"We'll tell Mario someone tried to speed past you guys and you just put up a shield to protect everyone, but next time you guys go out invite us! I want to see you screw some s*** over." Maggot said laughing.
The 5 boys left and told Mario their story and left, the other girls just stood there wide-eyed and mouths agap except for Alma.
"You know what, lets invite them the next time we go out, we could see what kind of crazy stuff they can do!" Alma said smiling widly as the girls looked at her in horror.
"Oh please! I bet you guys have seen far worse then what they can do." Alma said walking away.
"You have no idea how wrong you are Alma." Zelda, Peach, and Samus mumbled knowing quite well how destructive that group could be since they had been around them before.
Chapter 6: Halo Wars ave. plus dangerous women equals total destruction!
So the rest of the day went on.
The next day Arbiter got a call from Alma.
"Hello," said Arbiter.
"Hey," said Alma. "We are going out again tonight. Would you guys like to come?"
"Sure," said Arbiter "What time?"
"Around 7," said Alma.
"Ok," said Arbiter. "See you then."
"Who was that," said Maggot as he walked into the room.
Vigil followed behind him.
"It was Alma," explained Arbiter. "She wants to know if we want to go out with her and the girls tonight. Want to go?"
"Sure," said Vigil and Maggot together.
So Arbiter asked the others.
Ricky said he couldn't go because he had private business. Arbiter said he guessed it was stripping.
Boots couldn't go because he had a cold.
Killer couldn't go because his manhood had literally been burned off. Long story short, don't piss off a group of fire breathing dragons.
Awsome said he would go. Or at least that is what Arbiter and Vigil guessed " ^_^ " meant.
So that night the four guys went and met up with the girls. It was Samus, Alma, Peach, and Daisy.
Awsome was the first to see the girls and instantly he fell to the ground and started having a nose bleed.
All he could say was " #_# ".
As the rest of the group reached him, they saw why he fainted.
Samus wasn't wearing any of her armor.
After a long time of trying to wake up Awsome including Arbiter shouting the worst insult at Awsome "HEY! YOUR *** GIRLFRIEND IS HERE!", with no success, the group was getting frustrated.
"I'll take him to the hospital," said Daisy.
"Ok thanks," said Vigil.
So that left Maggot, Vigil, Arbiter, Alma, Peach, and Samus.
"So were would you like to go?" Arbiter asked.
Well all the girls argued over where they should go.Peach lost instantly because she had no mushrooms with her.Eventually Alma won, mainly because Samus didn't have her guns.So the group went to a movie.The girls wanted to see Twilight.
"No way am I going to watch Twilight," exclaimed Vigil. "I don't want to watch a chick-flick." Arbiter agreed. "I don't want to watch some g*y boy pretend hes straight."
Eventually they settled on Avatar, since it has both romance and action.
About halfway through the movie after a brief problem of Vigil of shouting "What the heel is that on their tails?!" , Samus got a bad headache.
"I'll take you home," said Maggot.
"Ok," said Samus.So the two left.
The rest of the group watched the movie. Afterwards, they ended up wiping out half of Switzerland, sinking 3 battleships, and causing an atomic explosion in China, all because someone accidently bumped into Alma. Arbiter1000's reaction to the events was joyous. "HAHAHA! Man so much fun so much fun! Next time we need to get everyone here and then see how much s*** we can destroy!"
So the four departed.
Vigil and Arbiter were walking back to the room. As they went into the room, they saw Maggot and Samus having sex. All that Arbiter could say was "Atta boy Maggot." Then the two walked back out the room.
Ch. 7 Chaotic Beta
It had been about a week since the movie and all the characters had been called to a giant adutorium.
"Why the hell are we here again?" NT asked as they walked in.
"Don't you remember were here for the beta!" Unbound Trex shouted in excitement.
"What Beta is it again?" Killer asked.
"The Halo Reach Beta thats what!" Unbound shouted.
"Right, anyway I need to take a dumper, see ya." Boot said walking to the mens room.
Suddenly a loud voice shouted over the intercom. "LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! WE NOW PRONOUNCE THE TESTERS OF TODAY'S BETA! THE FIRST GROUP IS THE HW AVE. RESIDENTS!" The announcer said.
All the videogame characters looked in their direction and the group felt uneasy.
"Why are they staring at us? Do I have something on my face?" Maggot asked.
"Besides the 10 hickies from Samus no." Vigil said with a victorious smirk.
"F*** you." Maggot said as they walked to the stage.
"I love that story!" Ricky shouted as they got on stage.
"AND THE OTHER GROUP IS A GROUP OF GIRL SCOUTS!" The Announcer said.
The Auditorium went silent.
"Did he just say Girl scouts?" Sora from Kingdom Hearts asked finally breaking the silence.
"Yes he did." Ryu answered.
Suddenly a group of girls looking 16-18 years old walked out.
"Who the hell are they?" NT shouted as he saw the "girls" walk in.
"Why your opponents." The announce said.
"Those ain't girl scouts their hooker scouts!" OB shouted.
"What did you just call us?" A pissed off girl scout said pulling out a cigar and lighting it.
"I said your a hooker." OB said hopping up to her.
"Oh really?" The girl said blowing a puff of smoke into his face.
Suddenly Dholla grabbed the arm behind her back twisted it breaking it, then slammed her head into the table.
"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!" Arbiter shouted.
"Disarming her." Dholla said raising the hidden Desert Eagle into the air.
"S***! ALRIGHT GIRLS GET THEM SO WE CAN GET OUTTA HERE AND GET OUR REWARD!." The leader said pulling out an AK.
"Crap! assassins!" OB shouted as two 50. cal machine guns appeared out of hatches on top of his monitor and began firing ripping two of the girls to shreds.
Everyone ran out screaming except for the residents of HW ave. and some others.
" About time I get to fight something." Vegeta said as he rushed forward punching one girl and sending her into the wall.
"Hey OB watch! IMMA FIRIN MAH LAZOR! BLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Ricky shouted as a blue beam shouted out of his mouth as his eyes bulge out, he incinerated 2 more girls and blew up the wall to the bathroom revealing Boot taking a dump.
"HOLY S***! What the hells happening?!" Boot shouted.
"Who the hell is blowing up the dam-" A janitor shouted running in before having a placed at his neck.
"Shut up and come with me." A girl said from behind said.
".........Could you repeat that again, I couldn't hear you over the sound of me s***in myself." The Janitor said but was simply draged away.
" She has a hostage!" Arbiter shouted as he stabbed a girl with unbound Trex.
Suddenly a spitter fell through the ceiling and began to hiss and roar at everyone.
"........THAT is the scariest f***ing thing I have EVER saw." Snake said staring at the creature.
" Hey! that girl reminds me of Awsomes old girlfriend! Now why did he leave her again?" Arbiter said to himself and began to wonder.
Suddenly a baby fell throught the ceiling as well. " X( " The baby said.
"Oh yeah thats why! Your a daddy Awsome." Arbiter said looking toAwsome.
"O_O" Awsome said in horror.
Suddenly the spitter shot acid at the hostage holder hitting her in the face and melting it off.
"Good god Awsome! Who the hell gave you your taste in Women!?" Wolverine shouted.
Soon all the assassins were dead and everyone gathered together.
"Theres no denying it now then." OB said.
"Agreed, the fine gentlemen are trying to kill us again." Dholla said.
"The question is: Why?" NT said.
The group just shrugged and went to their rooms, not knowing someone was watching.
"lolololololol, uz will al b dedz son mthr fckrz!" A man in a black cloak said.
If you would like to be a part of the story or know what HW ave. is about Send me, Eternal Vigil, or JFMK a PM asking about it.
Chapter 8: A talk
Everyone had gone back to the hotel after the fiasco with the Assassins and went to sleep.
"Someone help us!" A voice shouted. "Daddy help us!" Another voice shouted.
Arbiter1000's eyes shot open as he got up and gasped, looking around he saw he was in the hotel with the others, sighing he went and took a shower and got some coffee after getting a robe to wear. After he got his coffee he went onto the balcony and watched the sun light glisten off the ocean surface.
Arbiter sat there for a moment before speaking. "If your looking to scare me or take me by surprise, it ain't gonna happen."
Suddenly Alma appeared next to him. "Surprising, Can you always tell when someone is near you?" Alma asked looking at him.
"Always have been, have sharp senses." Arbiter said with a smirk. For a while they both just looked at the ocean.
"So you guys are from the Halo universe? I wonder how hard it was to make the war look real for the game." Alma suddenly said.
"It look so real because it was a real war." Arbiter said taking a drink of coffee.
Alma looked at him with a surprised look. "A real war?"
Arbiter nodded. " The war was hell, I fought in it for 15 years, definitely enough death for a life time." Arbiter said as his voice began to sadden. "I.......lost my family in the war, Parents, wife, daughter, everyone."
Alma became even more shocked. "Your-your died?" Alma asked wide eyed.
Arbiter slowly nodded. "We all were in the war, everything you guys see us do everyday, helps us cope, don't know why but it does, but that is also how we used to act, just not as much until now." Arbiter said lowering his head.
Alma wasn't certain on how to react. "I'm..........sorry for your problems in the past." Was all she said.
"You shouldn't seek revenge you know." Arbiter said as he turned his head to look at her.
"What? Why?" Alma asked in confusion.
"Cause I can tell that everything happening in your universe is real as well." Arbiter said.
"So, what if it is?" Alma said as she began to get angry.
"It ain't worth it, we've all been on a path for revenge and it never helped us." Arbiter said turning himself to her.
"You think you know the kind of suffering I went through? Do you understand how they ruined my life?! How dare you say I shouldn't get revenge! They deserve to die for what they did to me!" Alma said turning herself to Arbiter and shouting in his face.
"But what will that make you? Will it be worth it in the long run? Will you feel any better after? In the end you will be no better then them." Arbiter said calmly looking down at Alma, Alma just sneered and looked away. "Revenge will not make you feel any better, it will only make you feel worse, trust me I know how it feels." Arbiter said as he went to go back into his room.
"We're not finished yet." Alma said angrily looking in Arbiter's direction.
"This conversation ends after I say this, how will your child grow up? Being around you will cause hr to grow up to be as bitter and evil, your revenge will ruin her life." Arbiter said looking over his shoulder looking at the shocked Alma, after saying that Arbiter went inside, Alma Then looked down and began to cry, she had treated the only person who ever tried to befriend her cruelly, and now she had probably pushed him away.
Chapter 9: The other
A couple hours after the talk between Alma and Arbiter in an area deep under the surface of Maui a group of mysterious people met to converse on the situation.
"There seems to be some tension beginning to grow in the group, the plan to bring them to the Hawaiian Islands is working very well." A hooded figure said to 4 others.
"Of course it is working, who thought that those fools could get along with anyone over a prolonged period of time?" A man with a raspy voice answered to the other.
"Silence, the leader is coming." Another man with a deep voice said.
Suddenly another man walked into the room and went to the furthest end of the table.
"Welcome everyone, please remove your hoods." The hooded man said as he removed his to reveal himself to be CrusaderKing.
The others followed his lead and removed theirs to reveal Emperor Palpatine, Kane (C&C), Albert Wesker, Kerrigan of the Zerg, Sephiroth.
"My friends, it is so good to see you." Crusaderking said calmly to the rest of the group.
The group mumbled to the greeting.
"Now as we have learned tension has begun to flow in the group, and soon our time the strike will come." Crusader said as he sat down.
"Yes our time is coming but when we start this coming war what will our forces be?" Wesker said rubbing his hand through his hair.
"Simple, our army will be supplied by Palpatine, Kane, and Kerrigan, not only will they lend forces but I have begun building my own army to supply us if necessary." Crusader said looking to Kane, Palpatine, and Kerrigan.
"We may have agreed to supply you an army, but why do you not use your own forces?" Palpatine questioned as he glared at CrusaderKing.
"Simple, because you forces are just cannon-fodder for us so that we may try to reach our true goal." Another voice said as it entered the room.
"Ah Ripa, good of you to arrive and I couldn't have put it better myself, lady and gentlemen, I present to you the revived Ripa Moramee or as he was called in the beginning of the Human-covenant War, the Arbiter." Crusader said as Ripa stepped into the light.
"The legendary Ripa, never would I have thought that I would meet you." Sephiroth said in a monotone voice.
"Enough of the idle chit-chat, now down to the reason we are here, the holders of the keys to darkness." Kerrigan said.
"Of course, we should get to work." Crusader said as they began to talk.
Back on the Surface of Maui everyone is enjoying a day on the beach except for Arbiter1000.
"Hey Arbiter whats up?" KillerGrunt asked as he sat down next to Arbiter.
"Oh, its nothing really, just I really thought Alma was beginning to change." Arbiter said as he looked out at the ocean.
"Once you go down a path of Darkness it is very difficult to divert from that path." A somewhat robotic voice said suddenly.
Arbiter swung around as Killer Yipped and pissed himself, behind them was Darth Vader.
"OH. MY. GOD. ITS DARTH VADER!! I think I'm about to start drooling." Killer said as saliva began to pour out of his mouth like a waterfall.
"Odd, but as I was saying I overheard you about that Alma girl and i have to say that what you wish to do is very difficult, she is very deep down a path thats nearly impossible to escape." Vader said as sat down in a chair next to Arbiter.
"True, but you were able to escape." Killer said as he sat down as well to listen.
"Well that is because of the light hat was still in me and the fact of course I wasn't looking for revenge, but her, she has never really had a light in her to begin with plus she is trying to exact revenge, the most difficult path of darkness to escape, but you Arbiter, you seem to ease her when your around, you treat her as if she is not a tool but a living being, you befriended her, and if I believe there was anyone that could change her you can, so don't give up, keep trying and hopefully you will change her, you have the one thing no one seems to have, a heart of gold, and I hope everyone sees that the day you change Alma, in fact she is coming right now." Darth Vader said finishing his speech.
Arbiter's mandibles slacked as Killer's eyes bugged out. "That...........was the most epic speech I have ever heard." Killer said as he fell over.
As Vader had predicted Alma walked up to Arbiter with a sorrowful look on her face.
"Hey, can I talk to you Arbiter?" Alma asked.
Arbiter sighed and looked up. "Sure ok." He said as he got up.
They began to walk down a path leading into a jungle walkthrough.
"Arbiter, I wanted to apologize about earlier, I shouldn't have gone off on you like that, you were only trying to help me." Alma said as she began to fight back tears.
"Its alright, just know that no matter what I promise to be your friend and be there when you need it." Arbiter said smirking like an Idiot.
Alma looked up at him in shock them smiled and suddenly embraced him in a hug.
"uuuuuuh, Alma?" Arbiter asked in confusion as she hugged him.
Alma looked up at him and asked. "Could I have a hug? My daddy or anyone else never gave me one in my life." Alma asked as she began to cry again.
Arbiter nodded and began to hug back with uncertainty but then relaxed until he felt something bump him in the torso.
"Uhhhh, what the hell was that?" Arbiter asked.
"Dammit, why does she always kick when I get emotional." Alma mumbled as she back away and looked at her swollen gut.
"Cause it scary when you aren't a monotone ghost." Arbiter said jokingly receiving a laugh from Alma.
Suddenly they both looked around and realized that quite a few of the videogame characters were watching and had smiles on their faces.
"Oh you sons of ***! You better get outta here before I set your asses ablaze!" Alma shouted as everyone began to run away laughing, Arbiter also began laughing and running away, Alma sighed and smiled as she floated after everyone as they began their daily game of "Hide and go seek and if your caught by Alma run like a motherf***er."
Revenge of the Covenant 3: The fall of Earth
The beginning of the ends starts now.