Good work again, Yam. This has lived up to your last fic's legacy.
There were a few errors.
Prologue
1. Remember, if you have 'he said' or something similar after a bit of speech, end it with a comma, not a full stop.
2. an even more sacred look... Should sacred be scared?
3. "I will bring this up in the meeting I am on my way to." There's nothing wrong with this sentence, but I think that it could be worded better. Perhaps something along the lines of: "I am on my way to a meeting. I will bring it up there." You don't have to change it, just a suggestion.
4. We want all Shipmaster's... There's no need for an apostrophe in Shipmasters.
Chapter 1
1. of a near bye spectre... near bye should be nearby.
2. Malak's shoot connected to a near bye sentinel... shoot should probably be shooting. And once again near bye should be nearby.
3. The spectre moved on to a new battle field. A battle raging between flood and sentinel forces. You should connect these two sentences. Replace the full stop after battlefield with a semicolon (;).
4. Volvo laughed at the flood efforts, the parasite was even working together. Instead just using the most pathetic formations and attempts to board he's ever seen. Replace the full stop at the end of the first sentence with a comma. Also, replace he's with he'd.
Chapter 2
1. Every bit of speech needs puncuation. The first bit of speech in this chapter didn't. End it with a comma.
2. That doest give... doest should be doesn't.
3. You need space between paragraphs where you switched from the ship to the ground battle. You've got them connected, which is rather confusing.
4. "It won't be the first time," Should first be last?
Chapter 3
1. if you cant retrieve... cant should be can't.
2. Neco voice rang out... Neco should be Neco's.
3. how to use on of those... on should be one.
4. Who's was this anyway... who's should be whose.
5. leader ill ever be... ill should be I'll.
6. Punch threw enemy armor... threw should be through.
7. ill help the others... ill should be I'll.
Good work, keep it up.
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