Chapter 2
Another very well done chapter, Vigil.
1. "a deranged UNSC Admiral" 'Admiral' should not have a capital 'a'. Only use a capital for a rank if someone is calling a person by their rank or if it's before their name. For example, "Admiral Jones", "Excuse me, Admiral".
2. "I think their planning" 'their' should be 'they're'.
Good work.
Chapter 3
Once again, a good chapter, Vigil. I didn't think this chapter was overly bad, it did well at explaining how they were coping from their last mission.
1. "Richards then returned back to monitoring their progress" This isn't actually an error. I just think that you don't need 'back' in this sentence. You already have 'returned', so 'back' is unneccessary.
2. "we all still a little wounded from that mission" Here you need to either add 'are' in between 'we' and 'all', or change 'we' to 'we're'.
I'm looking forward to the next chapter, keep it up.
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