UNSC Dusk:

Mr. Grenade:

It's okay

:O!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

How can you say that!

He didn't, he just typed it,

I'm gonna combine the story together so no one has to go through the pages.

 

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Aloysius:

3. Mandatory search bar usage.

__________________________________________
http://s3.invisionfree.com/WWII_Domination/ (WWII forum game, still being worked on. Halo game, will soon follow)

I don't know how long I was out, but I actually thought I was dead. I awaken with full sight and sharp senses. The room I was in seemed very clean, too clean in fact. It was fully lit with light from sife windows covering the wall. The place seemed spotless, and undoubtly creepy. I looked around, presumably for an assistance lever. None. But luckily a nurse walked by the door and saw that I was awake.

"Oh...hang on, I'll go get Doctor Jennings." -She said as she hung in the door way.

"Jenning?" -I must have still been on some meds.

Well in took about another three minutes for the doctor to arrive.

"Good day Mr.Conan. Think you can walk?" -Doctor "Jennings" said as he enterd the door.

"Walk? But I just woke up. AND yesterday I saw that I was missing my legs and arms."

"Mr.Conan, that was over a week ago."

"Over a week!"

"Yes. I see that your implanted chips are working just fine."

"Implanted chips!"

"It's hard to explain, but you will soon be able to leave this place in two days."

"Kinda short? Don't you think."

"Well that's the max. If you pass all of the courses you may leave soon. Maybe you can re join the army."

"Well I would like to leave early. Rejoining the Arm-" -I stopped short. "What happened to me that brought these events to life?"

"Well...on your ride from the UNSC Frigate Rennings your pelican was fired upon by seraphs. Your ride made it down to the surface in safety. And when you and your fellow comrades were jumping out yo-" -I stopped him.

"Wraith?"

"Yes."

"Just one hit flipped the bird?"

"Yes. Now I guess that proves that you can remember exact events."

"Okay, but how can I walk."

"You want to see?"

"Yes!"

The doctor came over and lifted the sheets. Both legs and both arms look fine.

"How the-" -I gasped.

"Robotic limbs, eye, and some steel plates through out your body."

"So I'm like a.....spartan...."

"Not really, but you're tougher than the average marine, and in your chest we have a light weight bullet proof plate cabable to take a lot of heat, but not too much, so you're able lot more."

"Well I guess that's good."

"Oh...one more thing, we kinda implanted a "smart" AI into your skull/suit."

"My skull? Suit?"

"You are now more of a machine, you have electronic devices throughout your body."

"And the AI?"

"Her name is Jonie."

"...Jonie..." 

..................................................

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Aloysius:

3. Mandatory search bar usage.

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Okay you guys,

I'm signing off,

And don't forget to keep reading, I hope it get's even better, which it will..........

 

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Aloysius:

3. Mandatory search bar usage.

__________________________________________
http://s3.invisionfree.com/WWII_Domination/ (WWII forum game, still being worked on. Halo game, will soon follow)

NICE!!! I R so noob <---- you can kinda tell by teh spelling... LOL i completely forgot about this! cant wait to read.

To the part above^^^^^^

I added some more, just so I don't forget.

C Ya

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Aloysius:

3. Mandatory search bar usage.

__________________________________________
http://s3.invisionfree.com/WWII_Domination/ (WWII forum game, still being worked on. Halo game, will soon follow)

"Well if I have an AI in me, then was isn't it working? And why was one added?" -I asked. I thought it was cool to have an AI in me.

"The AI was added under strict military rule. So they made us put one in you," -Was one of his answers. "As of right now, the AI is under "shut-down" we will activate her momentarily."

"Okay, cool. Now can I get up?"

"You'll have to do the eye exam first."

"Eye exam?"

"Yes. I'll hand you a holo pad, then from there just do as the directions say."

"Okay."

The Doctor walked out the door. From here I examined my limbs; I flexed my arms, what wigged me out was the blue,yellow,and red lights eminating from my wrist. Then I tried my legs, and after flexing my legs I noticed that the calf lit up with lights too.

"I wonder what my eye looks like?" -I asked myself.

I looked around for something that's reflective. I saw a small mirror on the counter next to my bed. I "jigged" towards the mirror. But before I could notice what my eye was like, the doctor re-appeared.

"Well here's the exam. We're just now preping the AI, so once she's activated, the only way to de-activate her is from extracting here from you." -He said as he walked in through the door, looking down at a holo pad.

"Bout' time."

He handed my the pad. I just stared at him.

"What?" -He asked.

"Hands."

"Oh yea."

He de-straped me from the bed. I grabbed the pad and read the instructions. The test was no different from the times when I was young. I just flew through the them. Look at dot as it moved around the pad, close one eye and follow the dot, have one eye one each dot. Nothing different.

"Done." -I said within minutes.

"Well that was fast."

"Can I walk now?"

"I presume." -He spoke as he got up from a chair at a desk in the back of the room. He wlked up to the next to the bed and unstraped my legs.

"Is it going to be different?" -I asked as I sat up.

"Maybe a little."

"And if it's not?"

"You just have to take a few more test."

"Ugh..."

I slid off of the bed and re-took my first steps. It seemed fairly easy, but I guess that's from the chips and electronics in my body.

"Fairly easy." -I said as I walked around the room.

"Good to know. Want to go after the test, or just walk around."

"Test. Then I can go home."

"If you pass."

"If I pass." 

 

 

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Aloysius:

3. Mandatory search bar usage.

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Not a great first post in the thread.  I would suggest replacing it with a brief description of your story.

paragon:

Not a great first post in the thread.  I would suggest replacing it with a brief description of your story.

Kk, did that, hope it helps.

Now on with the story....

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"Okay Mr.Conan," - the Doctor said as I followed him through the hospital. "First we'll to a joint test, so we're sure that your joints won't break when you walk, then we'll do a running tests, jumping test, squatting test, and a stretching test. Then we'll do your arms: Strength, stretch, and rotation."

"Sure, what ever you want." -Was my reply.

I followed him through the halls, until we went to a "testing" facility. There were multiple rooms, faculty, and machinary/electronics. We then entered a large room. Inside the room was some machine to test my jumping/running/ect. The workers attached some electron pads to my leg joints and my chest, for my heart rate.

The stretches were easy, nothing hard. Then they set my up on the treadmill. First I did a slow jog, then a run, then a sprint: But something didn't feel right, like I didn't have full control or like I had extreme senses or something.

*Bright lights*

*Some figures conducting tests*

*More bright lights*

After that old experience I noticed that I was finished with the test.

"Anything odd happen? Symptons? Anything?" -Some tester asked.

"I felt like I didn't have full control, or th-"

"Just like we suspected."

"What do you mean?"

"Those effects will wear off over time. The electronics just took over. No biggie, you eventually be able to control them, or your AI will help."

"Oh...okay, anything I should do to keep that from happening?"

"Just try to keep consiounce(spell)"

I just nodded.

"Ready to get your AI?"

"Yes."

 

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Aloysius:

3. Mandatory search bar usage.

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WE walked down another long hall, into another testing room. There I had to sit down in a chair and be given some more meds.

"The AI will be placed in the back of your skull," -one of the technitions told me.

"What would happen if 'she' went crazy, would she take over my 'body'?"

"If she did then a fail safe device would immediatly kick in and disconnect her."

"Okay, got it."

The technitions pulled back the chair and strapped me down. As soon as I was begining to pass out they started their bussiness.

*Bright lights*

*Figures cast silohouets-sp-*

*Image of a young lady*

*Darkness*

"Hello...?" -came the voice of a seemenly young woman.

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Aloysius:

3. Mandatory search bar usage.

__________________________________________
http://s3.invisionfree.com/WWII_Domination/ (WWII forum game, still being worked on. Halo game, will soon follow)

very good im liking it so far :D

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thanks to Ryzza for the sig (I wish you saw it while you could still see it)


creeping shadow AKA someguy

 I parted my eyes open, but not a lot. I still felt drowsey.

"Wha-....who..." -I muttered as I awoke.

"You finally decide to awake, I thought so since your life moniters starting to come to life." -Came the voice again.

I opened my eyes some more. Another small clean, spotless, room.

"Wha- where am I?"

"Medical Room 322, St.Clarian's hospital, Reed's city, planet Thars VII, the Aldereen system. The time is 12:23:42."

"And where would you be?"

"Well look behind you and you may just see me."

I turned around, just to see a pillow. I looked back the front of the room. Then it hit me.

"Jonie?" -I asked, kinda felling stupid for looking behind me when I'm laying in a bed against a wall, second for talking to no one in an empty room.

"Ha-ha! Got you. Glad to actually see that you are awake, I've been getting bored in here." -The AI laughed.

"Hey I'm on meds. Give me a chance." -I muttered, now that I think about it, it is kinda funny for actually expecting someone behind me.

"Well your health systems have a low dosage of medications, so you shouldv'e expected me."

"You remind me of my mother."

"Don't worry I'll be more like a sister."

"I heard AI's aren't suppose to be 'smart'"

"Well my designer specifically designed me for herself, but after she heard of you she decided to give me to you as a gift."

"Well the time I meet her I'll ask them to take you back." -I smirked.

"Yea, real funny."

"So how I'm I suppose to see you?"

"You'll be given a holo-ejecter, that's built onto your chest plate."

"Chest plate? But that's already built into me."

"Not that one, the one you'll be given to."

"What do you mean?"

"The UNSC marines core is going to issue you a new combat suit, so then you may continue you duty."

"Duty! I'm a quad amputie! There is no way I'm fit for combat." -I objected.

"Why else to you think they gave you strength enhanced limbs, and a heat protective layer plate on each limb and your chest?" -She seemed very serious.

"What! You got to be kidding me!" -I yelled as I jumped up from the bed and marched out of the room in a full hospital gown.

"I'm not. Careful a UNSC officer is waiting at the entrance for you." -She seemed very serious, yet she also seemed like she was haveing a blast.

"Well he's going to have to have the whole UNSC to stop me."

"Well if you mean fourty soldiers, eight warthogs, and an armored personel carrier..."

I stopped in the halls, some passing civilians looked at me like I was some covenant species.

"Oh S-" -I turned around and headed quickly for a bathroom.

 Before I even got close to entering through the doors I was haulted.

"Mr.Conan? I' glad to see that you're active. Has Jonie been any fun?" -It was Docter Jennings.

"Umm. yes she has been, a lot of fun." -I answered uneasily.

"He's been a lot of fun too." -Jonie said joyfully.

"Nice to hear from you Jonie. Mr.Conan, you have some visitors, so you must dress quickly." -Doctor Jennings said. He grabbed my arm and pulled my away.

He took me back to my room, and into the room's bathroom. He left me there alone for a few seconds and came back shortly after. He had a full stack of clothing on his arms. He handed them to me and told me to put them on as quickly as possible.

The clothing consisted of a pair of dark blue jeans, and drab green tee shirt. I slowly put them on, and slugged myself out of the bathroom, knowing that the faster I go the faster I'll be on the front lines.

 

 

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Aloysius:

3. Mandatory search bar usage.

__________________________________________
http://s3.invisionfree.com/WWII_Domination/ (WWII forum game, still being worked on. Halo game, will soon follow)

I exited the bathroom once I finished dressing.

"Ready? Your visitor is waiting in the main lobby." -Dr. Jennings said as amusing as a possible.

"Yes, do you know who my visitor is?" -I asked, trying to see if he knew.

"I'm sorry but I mustn't give out that kind of information."

"Oh, okay."

I followed the doctor into an elevator, down to the main lobby, and to the officer. The officer was dressed decently, with around seven UNSC marines around him. He didn't say a word, just pointed at me, which brought his guards to nudge me out the door and into the APC.

"Okay, where we're taking you is with-held. Don't ask any questions, no smart mouth answers, and no holding up our schedule. If you do any of those you'll time in the field would start later, but be even longer." -Some soldier wearing a mask, inside of the APC ordered me.

And off we went...

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Aloysius:

3. Mandatory search bar usage.

__________________________________________
http://s3.invisionfree.com/WWII_Domination/ (WWII forum game, still being worked on. Halo game, will soon follow)

The ride was smooth, but it was long. The APC was filled with at least ten soldiers, inluding the officer. The cabin was muggy and no openings were aloud to come open. It was so miserable that I passed out.

*Small conficed area, filled with figures.*

*Red lights*

*Image of a woman*

*The outer perimeter of a military base*

*Small, lightly lit room*

*Bright Lights*

"Where I am?" -I muttered, trying to keep my head up.

"You mean where are you?" -Someone said, it sounded like Jonie.

"Yea, that."

"You are aboard the UNSC Carrier Dawn of the Universe."

"What! I'm in Orbit!" -I jumped up, and I hit my head on the cieling.

"Smooth one..., but no you aren't in orbit. Instead you are in slipspace."

"Slipspace..... Last I remember I was in an APC heading to some hidden ONI facility, but I passed out."

"You were, but you didn't pass. Your body functoins were taken over, and your internal systems took control. You were awake the whole time, cause how did you know it was an ONI facility"

"Again.... Okay then...where are we going?"

"The planet Farse."

"Farse?"

"Yes Farse."

"And why are we going there?"

"You are going to help some ODST take over an old Covenant outpost. The outpast was recently reclaimed by the Covenant, so now we're on our way to clear it out."

"Sounds easy." 

"Should be. With ODST. But you'll going to have to go into the deeper parts alone. Some Forruner structure is beneath the base."

"Why alone?"

"I'm not sure..."

"So where exactly am I?" -I asked as I jumped down from the bunk.

"Bunk #532. The armory is down the hall, on your left.

"The Armory..."

"Yes, Sergeant Wilkins is in charge there. He'll breif you." 

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Aloysius:

3. Mandatory search bar usage.

__________________________________________
http://s3.invisionfree.com/WWII_Domination/ (WWII forum game, still being worked on. Halo game, will soon follow)

I like it and forgive me for bitching or whatever but somewhat a professional writer both novel and script and...your writing this like a script not a story.

 You would add what you put in italics into you story as you decribe what you see.

Like I said no offense.

P.S. Check spelling, and make sure you indicate who is talking, other wise some readers could get confused.

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"Impossible YOU say, I say Time to Get Creative."

-Peter
Sept. 19, 2008

Peterb3921:

I like it and forgive me for bitching or whatever but somewhat a professional writer both novel and script and...your writing this like a script not a story.

 You would add what you put in italics into you story as you decribe what you see.

Like I said no offense.

P.S. Check spelling, and make sure you indicate who is talking, other wise some readers could get confused.

That's okay, but usually, sometimes not all the times, when only two ppl in the story are conversing the writer may sometimes not say which is speaking, cause it's only between those two characters if another was added to the  conversation the reader would be notified. I notice that sometimes, but not all the times.

I like writing scripts. =) I like them.

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Aloysius:

3. Mandatory search bar usage.

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http://s3.invisionfree.com/WWII_Domination/ (WWII forum game, still being worked on. Halo game, will soon follow)